A Word With "Culinary" Herb

She dared me!

2010-12-23T16:29:00.000-08:00

2009-06-25T18:45:00.001-07:00

I Never Liked Hardee's

2009-01-09T01:35:00.000-08:00

I always thought their hamburgers tasted like shit.

Schuckie Still Rocks

2008-12-05T11:49:00.001-08:00

Land of the Lost 2009

2008-07-10T08:07:00.000-07:00

Most Will Farrell movies suck. Fact. However, I will probably have to see this one even if I just rent the DVD. Bring on the Sleestacks!

Land of the Lost

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457400/

She Looks Like I Need a Drink

2008-04-18T14:16:00.000-07:00

It appears Chelsea Clinton has inherited her mother's photogenic qualities.

Easter Visit

2008-04-01T14:55:00.000-07:00

Terry Kath

2008-01-25T07:53:00.000-08:00

Died on January 23, 1978

Possibly the most underrated guitar player of all time. Terry was the guitarist for the band Chicago and founding member of the band. Jimi Hendrix was quoted as saying, "That cat is better than me," when Chicago opened for Hendrix in the late 60's.

Air Guitar Hero

2008-01-14T14:45:00.000-08:00

This is a silly but fun looking gadget.

How Many?

2008-01-14T06:28:00.000-08:00

Click the image to find out.

RIP: Robert Craig "Evel" Knievel

2007-12-03T07:30:00.000-08:00

October 17, 1938 - November 30, 2007

For Those about to Rock

2007-10-11T07:49:00.000-07:00

Cowboys rookie kicker, Nick Folk, looks like he might be rocking out to AC/DC, but it was Folk who had just rocked the crowd in Buffalo with a game winning 53 yard field goal. The field goal gave Dallas their first lead of the game as time expired and catapulted the Cowboys to 5-0 for the first time since 1983.

On October 12th, Folk was named NFL Rookie of the Week for his performance against the Bills.

Tony Romo: NFC Player of the Month

2007-10-03T18:47:00.000-07:00

Dallas Cowboys QB, Tony Romo, was named NFC Offensive Player of the Month after completing 72 of 121 passes for 1,199 yard and 11 touchdowns with three interceptions. His touchdown total is second in the league behind New England's Tom Brady, who has 13. Tony is also in competition with Tom Brady to determine who is banging the hottest chick this month, but the jury is still out on that one.

GFY: Rock & Roll Hall of Fame

2007-10-02T13:11:00.000-07:00

Once again, the Rock & Roll HOF shows that it is nothing more than a bad joke. This is the most ridiculous group of nominees EVER.

The 2008 nominees:
Chic
Donna Summer
Madonna
The Beastie Boys
Afrika Bambaataa
John Mellencamp
The Dick Clark Five
The Ventures

WTF? Once again, acts like KISS, The Moody Blues, Chicago, Alice Cooper, Tina Turner, Steve Winwood, John Fogerty, etc. etc, get the shaft. I'm not a fan of everyone not in the HOF, but how are any of these people not in before Donna Summer and Afrika Bambaata? Most of the people going in these days are not what I consider Rock & Roll. My message to the RNR HOF is "Go Fawk Yourself" (using my best Tony Soprano imitation).

GFY: David Haugh

2007-09-24T08:10:00.000-07:00

I'm not doing my Dallas Cowboys blog this year, so information I care to discuss about the boys will be posted here.

David Haugh is a Chicago sports writer that had crow for breakfast this morning. Mr. Haugh's article on Saturday basically stated that Tony Romo is nothing but hype, because he has yet to face a top rated defense, and surely poor little Antonio was going to break like a twig under the pressure of Da Bears mighty top ranked defense.

Nothing against Romo, the hottest Cowboy since Tim McGraw, but his rapid inclusion in conversations about the league's quarterbacking elite ignores the shoddy defensive teams that have helped Romo's blue star rise.

Pro Bowl or no Pro Bowl, until Romo stars against a defense ranked in the top half of the league—11 of 13 opponents haven't been—a big question will remain.

Tony Romo completed 22 of 35 passes for 329 yards and 2 TDs as Da Boys spanked the Shitcago Bears 34-10 last night at Soldier Field.

The brilliant David Haugh also thought that the Bears Charles Tillman was going to slow down Terrell Owens last night, because Tillman was able to slow down some other big receiver before. Well, Owens turned Tillman into his bitch by catching 8 passes for 145 yards.

Suicide by Guillotine

2007-09-13T14:28:00.000-07:00

Owen Wilson could learn a thing or two from this guy.

Allen Park police find man's body, guillotine in wooded area
Doug Guthrie / The Detroit News

ALLEN PARK -- A 41-year-old Melvindale man, whose body was discovered Monday, went to extraordinary and bizarre lengths to kill himself by constructing a 7-foot-tall guillotine in a wooded area near Fairlane Green shopping center.

"It was the most deliberate suicide I've seen in my 28 years (as a police officer)," said Dale Covert, deputy chief of Allen Park Police. "It was one of those things where when you saw it, you couldn't help asking yourself, "What the heck?"

Groundskeepers from the shopping center, at Outer and Fairlane drives, discovered the device and the body in a thickly wooded area shortly after 11 a.m. Monday. About a third of the 243 acre former Ford Motor Company landfill is being developed for retail shopping while the remainder is undeveloped green space crisscrossed with trails.

Police, who believe the man had been dead two days, declined to release his name. Covert said the man had lived within walking distance of the spot where he died. Investigators believe the man made numerous trips to carry the wooden and metal parts of his contraption into the woods where he assembled it. Covert said the man didn't leave a note.

"He spent some time doing this," Covert said. "This wasn't a spur of the moment plan."
The machine utilized a "swing arm-type blade," according to police, instead of the more famous falling blade of guillotines used by executioners in France from that nation's revolution in 1792, until the death penalty was outlawed there in 1981. The device had a lever that allowed the man to trigger it himself, Covert said.

Allen Park police and firefighters disassembled the machine after photographing it at the scene. Some of the metal parts, including the blade, were kept as evidence while the wooden parts were to be disposed of because they were soaked in blood and considered a biohazard, Covert said.

Although the device didn't completely decapitate the victim, Covert said he believes the man died instantly from his injuries.

"It's the most bizarre thing I've ever seen in my life,"Covert said. "It probably didn't quite work the way he planned, but it succeeded in taking his life, probably instantly. I don't believe he suffered."

A Monkey and His Pigeon Bitch

2007-09-13T12:12:00.000-07:00

The abandoned monkey who has found love with a pigeon
13th September 2007

They're an odd couple in every sense but a monkey and a pigeon have become inseparable at an animal sanctuary in China.

The 12-week-old macaque - who was abandoned by his mother - was close to death when it was rescued on Neilingding Island, in Goangdong Province.

After being taken to an animal hospital his health began to improve but he seemed spiritless - until he developed a friendship with a white pigeon.

The blossoming relationship helped to revive the macaque who has developed a new lease of life, say staff at the sanctuary.

Now the unlikely duo are never far from each other's side, but they aren't the only ones to strike up an unusual friendship.

Earlier this year a pig adopted a tiger cub and raised him along with her piglets because his mother couldn't feed him. And in 2005 a baby dear named Mi-Lu befriended lurcher Geoffrey at the Knowsley Animal Park in Merseyside after she was rejected by her mother.

Iraqi Insurgent Goes BOOM!

2007-09-07T19:49:00.000-07:00

This is supposedly a video of an Iraqi shooting off mortars. I hate to give away the ending, but I like the way the video stops abruptly, because I figure the shrapnel took out the camera man.

You see, this is an example of why I think it is ridiculous that several of the Warner Bros. cartoons were censored and banned from TV. This poor bastard would have known not to buy ammunition from an ACME mail order catalog if his parents had let him watch one Wile E. Coyote clip when he was younger. I wonder if all of that "Allahu Akbar" jabber helped any? I mean after the explosion of course, because it's obvious that it didn't help before or during.

Osama Bin Laden Through the Years

2007-09-07T19:13:00.000-07:00

Click the pic to enlarge

You would think a guy resourceful enough to get Just for Men hair coloring in the mountains of Afghanistan could also get his hands on a high-res camera. Anyone else think he looks like he's had a couple of nose jobs over the years, or is it just me?

Seriously: I took a few art classes a long time ago in which we studied faces, and the guy in the most recent picture doesn't look like Bin Laden to me. His nose is different, along with a few other features, in my opinion. I'll be interested to hear what the experts have to say next week. Personally, I think the real Osama has been room temperature for a couple of years.

And the Winner is...

2007-08-31T21:14:00.000-07:00

Another Guy Worthy of Nomination for the Darwin Award

2007-08-21T20:11:00.001-07:00

Those wacky Euros. I wonder if this idiot ever heard of Timothy Treadwell, the Grizzly Man?

BELGRADE, Serbia (Reuters) -- A 23-year old Serb was found dead and half-eaten in the bear cage of Belgrade Zoo at the weekend during the annual beer festival.

The man was found naked, with his clothes lying intact inside the cage. Two adult bears, Masha and Misha, had dragged the body to their feeding corner and reacted angrily when keepers tried to recover it.

"There's a good chance he was drunk or drugged. Only an idiot would jump into the bear cage," (side note: NO SHIT) zoo director Vuk Bojovic told Reuters.

Local media reported that police found several mobile phones inside the cage, as well as bricks, stones and beer cans.

Life Imitates Jeff Foxworthy

2007-08-21T14:40:00.002-07:00

You might be a redneck if: Anyone in your family has ever died after saying, "Hey ya'll. Watch this!" -- Jeff Foxworthy

Excerpts from The Courier Democrat of Russellville, Arkansas published on Monday, August 21, 2007.

Motorcyclist dies in crash
25-year-old man traveling in excess of 100 mph, witnesses say

By Mary Kincy Benefield, Reporter

A Russellville man died Sunday after an early-morning collision with another vehicle at the intersection of East Parkway Drive and North Greenwich Avenue. Witnesses estimate motorcyclist Matthew Taylor, 25, was traveling southbound on North Greenwich Avenue at speeds in excess of 100 miles per hour shortly before 1 a.m. when he skidded through an intersection and struck the side of a 2005 Buick sedan.

According to witness statements taken from four men attending a party on East E Street near the scene, Taylor, who had been at the party drinking, witnesses stated, was showing his motorcycle to a group in attendance at the party when he started the bike, revved the engine, and told the group to “watch this.” He then drove the motorcycle approximately three blocks south on Greenwich Avenue before turning around and accelerating back past the house, witnesses said, after which he attempted to stop but “slid through the stop sign and struck the passenger side of the vehicle.”

Taylor was transported to Saint Mary’s Regional Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead at 1:29 a.m. The driver of the other vehicle was uninjured.

Elvis: 30th Anniversary

2007-08-16T07:29:00.001-07:00

A few pictures taken on the first day of Elvis Week 2007.

Hell Ain't a Bad Place to Be

2007-08-15T13:44:00.001-07:00

These guys are obviously having a good time down there.

RIP: Weekly World News

2007-08-13T13:26:00.001-07:00

1979-2007

Cowher's Return

2007-08-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

Less than one year after resigning from the position of head coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers, Bill Cowher is back with the team as their new mascot.

Congratulations, Michael

2007-08-06T14:20:00.001-07:00

Anyone doubting that Michael Irvin deserves to be in the Hall of Fame is clueless. I think it's ridiculous how people start yapping about his off-the-field issues, but I never heard anyone say Lawrence Taylor, the greatest LB to ever play the game, should have been kept out. Lawrence Taylor's off-the-field behavior makes Irvin look like Billy Graham.

The following clip is an example of the types of plays Irvin made for 10 years. A two hour movie could be made from his career highlight reel. I also like this clip because it illustrates the type of player Troy Aikman was. Several idiots also had arguments for why they thought Aikman should not have been inducted last year.

I plan to make the trip to Canton three years from now when Emmitt Smith gets inducted.

Getting Away with Murder

2007-07-13T12:35:00.000-07:00

If you want to get away with murder, all you have to do is commit the crime in Russellville, Arkansas.

Russellville is a small town that sits on the Arkansas River approximately 75 miles northwest of Little Rock. Being a small town, Russellville doesn’t have a lot of major crime; however, the police department has plenty of cops around just in case. This can be evidenced by the fact that every time someone rolls through a stop sign or doesn’t signal properly, there are usually 3-5 Russellville police vehicles, complete with K-9 unit, on the scene in a jiffy. Apparently, it takes one officer to hold the ticket book, one officer to put Grandma through 30 minutes of field sobriety tests, one officer to watch the dog sniff around Grandma's trunk for cocaine, and between one and two officers to put the fear of God into Grandma so she comes to a complete stop in the future. Too bad the Russellville Police Department isn’t as diligent when a resident is murdered.

In December of 2005, Nona Dirksmeyer, a 19 year old college student was murdered in her Russellville, Arkansas apartment. According to reports, Nona had been strangled, stabbed, and then bludgeoned on the back of the head with the base of a lamp. The blows from the lamp caused the fatality. Nona was found by her boyfriend, Kevin Jones, his friend Ryan Whiteside, and Kevin’s mother. The trio went to the apartment after Kevin couldn’t get in touch with Nona after repeated attempts.

Some six or seven months later, Kevin Jones was arrested for the murder of Dirksmeyer. The key piece of evidence against him was a bloody palm print found on the shade of the lamp used as the murder weapon. Jones claimed that he never touched the lamp after discovering Nona’s body; however, he was found straddling her and he was covered in blood when the EMT workers arrived on the scene.

Jones’ trial began this week in Ozark, Arkansas after a change of venue request was granted to the defense. There have only been a few witnesses called to the stand so far, but I believe the defense already has the case locked in their favor after only three days of testimony.

Here is what has been stated so far:

· According to the Detective Sgt. that worked at the scene, the RPD has no procedure for preservation of evidence from a crime scene and no procedure for preservation of the crime scene itself.

· Police never requested to search Jones’ vehicle for blood or DNA evidence, because they figured if he did kill her that he wouldn't have had "much" blood on him. Obviously these dorks don't watch Cold Case Files. It only takes a drop.

· Dirksmeyer’s cell phone was found on the kitchen floor with the battery missing. The phone was never tested for fingerprints or DNA and was released to Dirksmeyer’s father before any arrests were made.

· An officer testified that he didn’t bother getting prints from the phone, because it was not collected into evidence until the following day, and another officer had picked up the phone and placed it on the kitchen table. It was assumed the officer that picked up the phone was not wearing gloves and would have compromised any prints.

· Jones’ house was never searched.

· Jones had no cuts or abrasions that would have likely resulted from the struggle.

· Two cups with straws found in the bathroom trash of Dirksmeyer’s apartment were never collected and tested for DNA, because the officer assumed they had been used by Dirksmeyer and Jones.

· A condom wrapper was found that contained male DNA not belonging to Jones.

· Piece of a finger nail found in the carpet by the defense contained male DNA not belonging to Jones. (Why didn’t the police find it first?)

· No DNA has been collected from anyone other than Jones and Dirksmeyer.

· Fingerprints were found on the base of the lamp that was used as the murder weapon. One officer testified that the prints were not usable for comparison to other finger prints; however, it was determined that the prints did not belong to Jones. Huh? Didn't the prints on the lamp have to be COMPARED to Jones' in order to determine they weren't his? In any case, the RPD did not collect fingerprints from other people questioned.

How pathetic. I think the prosecution should just go ahead and drop their case now. Jones may have killed Dirksmeyer, but it will not be proven beyond a reasonable doubt as required for a conviction. Not only was the investigation botched, but the prosecuting attorney -- whose primary experience is busting people for writing hot checks -- is going up against a defense attorney that graduated from Harvard Law School. Good luck with that, Mr. Gibbons.

The truly sad thing is that the person that killed this young girl, whether it's Jones or someone else, will probably never be brought to justice. Whatever evidence existed has been lost forever. I assumed most police departments would have put procedures in place to prevent this type of fiasco after the OJ Simpson trial. I'm sure some places have, but not in Russellville, Arkansas.

So, yes, you can get away with murder in Russellville, Arkansas. Just make sure you obey the traffic laws , and don't write any bad checks.

Microplanes in the Movies

2007-07-09T13:35:00.000-07:00

Last year a young angel removed his wings using a Microplane grater in X-Men: The Last Stand. This year you can see Microplane graters being used in a traditional manner in the new Pixar animated film, Ratatouille.

Concert for Diana

2007-07-03T14:46:00.001-07:00

I managed to catch a little of this concert on VH1 Sunday afternoon, and I watched a few of the performances on the website. I didn't see any Queen at Live Aid '85 type performances, but Duran Duran, Brian Ferry, and Natasha Bedingfield seemed to hold their own. I would have never sat and watched all six hours of this thing. Brian Ferry is still cool at 62 years old, and Donny Osmond still isn't at whatever age he is. I always thought the universe would implode if Donny Osmond performed on the same stage on the same day as Kanye West, P. Diddy, and Duran Duran. I guess I was wrong.

The Man in the Hat is Back, So is the Bald Guy

2007-06-26T11:29:00.000-07:00

This pic was taken June 21, 2007 by Steven Spielberg. It's the first time Harrison Ford has worn the Indiana Jones costume since 1989. The fourth movie in the series will be released May 22, 2008. I've never seen all of the third movie, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, so Mr. Spielberg probably won't get my $8-$10 for Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade: We Mean it this Time either. I guess Hollywood just can't help trying to cash in on nostalgia.

Another sequel that is also several years removed from its most recent predecessor is Live Free or Die Hard. The fourth movie in that series will be hitting theaters this summer. I have to admit the previews seem interesting, and I have read that the movie is largely stripped of CGI special effects and actually relies on a good plot and good acting to make the movie interesting. What a concept. I haven't made up my mind one way or the other whether I'll actually shell out the bucks to see it in the theater, but I'll post a review of it if I do.

The Sopranos Finale

2007-06-12T07:47:00.000-07:00

There isn't much I can say about The Soprano's series finale that isn't already going around the net, but I have to offer my opinion about one thing: I'm sick of all of the whining about how disappointing the ending was for most people. The only disappointing thing is that America is full of a bunch of spoiled idiots that felt they deserved an exact ending spoon fed to them. God forbid that David Chase decided to leave things to the audience's interpretation. Kelly Ripa said that the ending was like a cheap one night stand, something I'm sure she's an expert at. The fact that the ending was above and beyond Kelly Ripa's comprehension level is just further proof that Chase did it right.

My interpretation is that Tony got whacked. That's why Chase went through the trouble of doing the flashback to when Tony and Bobby were on the boat talking about getting whacked. "They say you don't even hear it coming," Bobby said. During the final restaurant scene, Tony looked up every time somebody walked in the door and the bell rang. The camera showed him look up (a total of four times) and then quickly changed to his perspective (the audience saw what he saw). The fourth time when Meadow was walking in the door, Tony looks up and everything went to black. My feeling is that when the shot switched to Tony's perspective that final time, it was black, because he was dead. We saw what he saw: nothing. Probably 95% of people were expecting the show to end with Tony getting a bullet through the head, and that is exactly why I think David Chase is a genius for NOT ending it that way.

If you choose to believe Tony didn't get his, then you wouldn't be wrong either. It's your choice, which is not something traditional television shows give you. The ending also leaves the door open in the event that HBO decides to offer a trailer load of money to Gandolfini and Chase for a future Sopranos project without killing the show's credibility by using a Dallas-style "It was only a dream" bullshit sequence. I think the show is done for good though.

If you are one of the disappointed whiners, just shut the fuck up and go read a few books. Practice making up your own mind and using your imagination. The Sopranos never followed the pattern of a regular TV show, so why would you be disappointed that it didn't end like one?

Chicago - Live at the Garden

2007-06-11T08:12:00.000-07:00

I have been a life long fan of the band Chicago, and I went to see them on their 40th Anniversay tour in Memphis this past weekend. The band doesn't get much exposure these days, and they don't release new music too often, so I sometimes think I'm one of the few people around that still remembers them. The 25,000 or so people at the Memphis Botanic Garden made me realize that I'm not alone in remaining a fan of the band.

The Memphis Botanic Garden is in their seventh year of hosting "Live at the Garden," a series of six outdoor concerts that take place through the summer. They let you haul in your own lawn chair, food, and even booze if you choose to do so. If you come empty handed, there are concession stands willing to sell you an overpriced sandwich and glass of beer. One of the band's members later joked that instead of a mosh pit that they had a nosh pit, and quickly laughed at his own joke.

The band played a solid two hour set that included songs from every era of their history. The band had started shying away from some of their 80's hits, because a lot of the older fan base thought the band was selling out by moving from their jazz/rock fusion sound of the early years, but it appears Chicago now recognizes that their success in the 80's is part of their overall success.

A few notes about the band:

Sold more than 120 million albums worldwide.
Only band to have chart hits with songs sang by seven different lead singers.
Only band to have chart hits in five different decades: 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's, and 00's.
The most successful male American band in terms of Billboard hits.
Shortly after the 9-11 attacks, the band began using a gigantic American flag as the stage backdrop, and are still using it to this day.

Who is Happy Guy?

2007-06-04T16:58:00.000-07:00

I was browsing through Facebook, and I ran across this group titled "Who is Happy Guy?" It peaked my curiosity a bit, so I clicked on the link. Here are some excerpts from what the poster of the profile had to say:

My brother Nate found this photo in the rubbish bin of a hotel room in Banff, Canada almost 7 years ago. He kept the picture and since then, Happy Guy has been smiling at the family from his spot on our kitchen fridge. The goal of this group is to find Happy Guy and meet him. Then we'll find out the answers to those questions that need to be asked; Is he is the Happiest Man in the world? Why did he throw out the picture?

Recently Big Dave Sturdy, the father of myself and Nate, made a “Who is Happy Guy” shirt for Nathan. He ironed the picture to the back of a shirt bought in an op-shop for $1. The front of the shirt has a colourful dragon on it. To spread the word, Nate wore the shirt to our local pub. That is the extent of the shirts usage thus far as Nate left it on my bedroom floor……..where it still remains to this very day. Will the shirt make another appearance? Time will tell.
-
If you'd like to join the cause and help find Happy Guy, click the pic and you will be directed to the Facebook page.

Long Live the Queen

2007-06-02T19:13:00.001-07:00

Freddie Mercury may have been dead for nearly sixteen years, but his memory is alive and well in Hollywood. Spin Magazine announced that Borat star, Sacha Baron Cohen, will portray Mercury in an upcoming movie. The look of the Borat character was based on Freddie Mercury. Cohen beat out Johnny Depp for the lead role. Initially, I wondered how Johnny Depp could even be considered, but then I remembered what Depp looked like in Donnie Brasco. Slap a mustache on Donnie Brasco and you've got Freddie Mercury. The third pic down is my very poorly photoshopped version of what Johnny Depp would have looked like as Mercury.

In addition to the film about Freddie, George Clooney can be seen in Oceans Thirteen wearing a disguise that is obviously inspired by Freddie Mercury. I haven't seen the movie, so I don't know if it is mentioned in the film or not, but it's too good of a likeness to be an accident. The only thing missing is a pair of Ray Bans. The final pic in the strip is of Clooney dressed like Mercury. Click the pic to enlarge the images.

From Spin Magazine: (click here to visit the website)

Sacha Baron Cohen, the hirsute and comical actor from faux-doc blockbuster Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan, has signed to on to portray flamboyant Queen frontman Freddie Mercury in a forthcoming yet-to-be titled film, the U.K.'s Mirror reports. Cohen, 35, reportedly nudged out Johnny Depp for the role, which will depict Mercury's music, wild lifestyle, and untimely death in 1991 at the age of 45, due to an AIDS-related illness. "Film makers are working flat out to get the best possible script," an unidentified source told the Mirror. "Sacha loves the idea he can get away with playing Freddie after modeling Borat's look on him." But tickling our thinker is who will be cast to play the part of Queen axeman Brian May and shred out his mountainous rock solos. Andrew Stockdale of Wolfmother's got the hair.

Man Sells Neighbor's Dog at Yard Sale

2007-05-25T09:42:00.000-07:00

I think this is the first time that an event that happened about a block away from my house has ever made national news (even the back page). Click the pic to read the story.

30 Years and Still Going

2007-05-25T07:52:00.000-07:00

The Star Wars franchise was launched 30 years ago this week. It's amazing that a movie that initially cost $13 million to make has earned over $22 billion. Not a bad return on investment. Although it has been a couple of years since the final movie was released, the Star Wars franchise earned $1.5 billion last year. That's more than newer franchises such as Superman, Spider-Man, and Pirates of the Carribean brought in during the same time period.

Is Paul Shaffer the Iron Man?

2007-05-24T20:26:00.000-07:00

I was watching the 2nd Annual VH1 Rock Honors Awards tonight, and Ozzy Osbourne was the final honoree. During Ozzy's tribute, they played a clip from the video for Iron Man, and for the first time I noticed that there is an Andy Warhol style picture in the background of the video that looks exactly like Paul Shaffer, David Letterman's band director. Strange.

What a Difference a Year Makes

2007-05-24T18:29:00.000-07:00

The pic on the left is of Eddie Van "Munster" Halen a little over a year ago at a VH1 event. The picture on the right was recently published by Guitar World and is the first public photo of Eddie since he recently completed rehab. It looks like he put on some much needed weight and spent a few bucks to get his teeth back into shape. I don't know if he had any other work done, but he looks healthy. If all rehab had done was fix his hair, it would have been worth it. I wonder if Van Halen will reschedule that canceled reunion tour with David Lee Roth that was supposed to happen this summer. I doubt it, because I think trying to stay sober around DLR's incessant yapping would be difficult for anyone.

The Sopranos Shocker with Lincoln Log Sandwiches

2007-05-21T16:33:00.000-07:00

Sunday night's episode of the Soprano's, The Second Coming, had one of the most disturbing scenes in the history of the show. No, Tony didn't whack another relative (this time). The scene that was so hard to watch was Carmela preparing a dish called Lincoln Log sandwiches. Carmela could be seen spreading cream cheese into the middle of four sliced hot dogs that were placed on two slices of bread. When her son, AJ, came down stairs, Carmela proudly announced that she had made Lincoln Log sandwiches and presented the dish to AJ. AJ passed on the sandwiches and went directly out to the pool to drown himself once Carmela left the house. AJ has been suffering from depression on the show, and I guess the Lincoln Log sandwiches pushed him over the edge. Luckily, Tony came home and heard AJ struggling in the pool in time to pull him out, but not before managing to scarf down about half of a Lincoln Log sandwich. Yumbo!

I did a little research, and I couldn't find any information about Lincoln Log sandwiches on the internet, and I initially thought it was something contrived for the show. However, after a little digging, I found that the sandwiches are actually a variation of Seattle Cream Cheese Dogs, a popular food sold by street vendors in Seattle. The Seattle version uses sweet onions, mustard, and sauerkraut (optional). Mmmmm. Hot dogs, cream cheese, AND rotten cabbage. Sounds like a real culinary delight. If you'd like to see the recipe for Seattle Cream Cheese Dogs, click the pic above.

Tony Romo & Carrie Underwood

2007-05-16T22:53:00.001-07:00

My man, Romo, was Carrie Underwood's date at the Country Music Awards last night. The two haven't announced they are a couple, but come on! She was on the Cowboys' sideline for about two hours during the Thanksgiving Day game last year before and after performing at halftime. Troy Aikman dated country music singer, Lori Morgan, so I have confidence that Romo won't let his celebrity girlfriend screw up his playing. I'm glad Romo is with Carrie Underwood and not Jessica Simpson. Rumors were that Romo dated Simpson, but in reality he never got further than having lunch with her father. Carrie is much smarter than Simpson as evidenced by the fact that she duped America into voting for her as the 2005 American Idol winner when she actually should have been competing on Nashville Star. I believe Romo dating Simpson would have just been too taxing on him and a distraction because of having to explain stuff all of the time.

Romo took some friendly ribbing from the media for holding Underwood's purse while she accepted her two awards.

"You have to help out when you can," he said. "I am just a secondary protocol there. I am there to do a job, and it was to hold the purse."

Romo also met George Straight while at the awards, and Cowboys' tight end, Jason Witten, claimed that Romo had no idea who George Straight was.

"I knew who he was," Romo said with a big grin. "I've never met him before, but I knew who he was. Witten doesn't know what he's talking about." Yeah right. I wish I didn't know who George Straight was either, and I sure as hell wouldn't be bragging to anyone about meeting him.

Popular Mechanics Editor's Choice Award

2007-05-16T22:11:00.000-07:00

A product I designed and am receiving my first patent for won a Popular Mechanics Editor's Choice Award for Best New Product. There were thirteen winners out of the thousands of new tools displayed at this year's National Hardware Show. The tools I designed will be featured in an upcoming issue of Popular Mechanics magazine. The tools will also be featured on several TV programs on HGTV, Do-It-Yourself Network (DIY), and PBS in upcoming months. Click the pic for more info about the Editor's Choice Award.

The 2007 Beale Street Music Festival

2007-05-09T07:36:00.000-07:00

The 2007 Beale Street Music Festival came and went over the weekend. Here are a few notes about the festival and Memphis in general.

Attendance: 300,000+ (estimate)
Weather: Mostly hot & humid.
Racks of ribs I consumed: 3
Best ribs: Blues City Café
Number of kids I met on their first acid trip: 1
Number of times the kid asked if the acid would kill him: 14
The Mall of Memphis: Demolished
Graceland: Still standing
The Pyramid: Ever since the NBA decided the Pyramid wasn't worthy of hosting professional basketball games and the FedEx Forum was built, the less than 20 year old Pyramid has sat empty. Now, there is a Bass Pro Shop in the bottom level. What a joke. The FedEx Forum is nice, but it does not have the character and the appeal of the Pyramid, and I think it's a total waste of a great arena.
Number of people too drunk to walk: Hundreds
Jesus Freaks: Several
Pan Handlers: The only people asking for money were firemen collecting for the "Fill the Boot" campaign for the March of Dimes. A lot different from five years ago when homeless people were everywhere.
Wolfmother & Godsmack: Sounded great, but I bailed. Temperatures and humidity were around 90. The Budweiser Stage where the bands played was fenced off for some reason, but nobody controlled how many people entered the fenced area. Far too crowded and hot to see anything or enjoy the show.
Papa Roach: Excellent. The small amount of rain and cool breeze blowing in from the Mississippi was welcome. No fence around the Autozone Stage so the crowd wasn’t packed like sardines.
Daughtry: This American Idol loser rocks. Great band.
Hinder: If Steven Tyler of Aerosmith and Joshua Todd of Buckcherry somehow had a kid, it would be Austin Winkler, lead singer of Hinder. Austin isn’t quite as ugly as Tyler or Todd, but his lanky frame and stage mannerisms make it obvious that his style was influenced by both. Hinder is probably the best band I’ve ever seen live that only has one album out. The headlining band on the closing night of the festival is usually an established act, but Hinder showed they were worthy of being the main act.
Drive between Memphis and Little Rock: Still sucks.

Yumbo!

2007-05-02T10:26:00.000-07:00

These are actual photos from old cookbooks. I'd guess they are from the 60's, because whoever thought this crap looked appetizing enough to publish must have been tripping on acid. Click the pic to see all of the Nauseating Cookbook Photos on Cheezball.net.

Brad Pitt is Overweight and George Clooney is Obese

2007-04-17T12:53:00.000-07:00

The past few months I’ve been trying to shed a few pounds, and I was browsing various dietary websites for information when I ran across the government’s BMI calculator. BMI stands for Body Mass Index, and the U.S. government uses BMI calculations to determine if a person is underweight, ok, overweight, obese, or clinically obese.

I am 6ft. tall and according to the BMI calculator my “normal” weight range begins at 138 lbs. Huh? I was 5 ft. 6 in. tall, eleven years old, and skinny as a pole when I last weighed 138. I would look like a holocaust refugee at 138 lbs. I knew the BMI calculations were ridiculous, but I didn’t realize how ridiculous.

BMI calculations do not take individual traits like bone structure or muscle mass into account. The World Health Organization has suggested using waist, height, and shoulder measurements, but the U.S. government says “No.” I suppose it wouldn’t be that big of a deal, but there are lunatics in our country that want to start putting a “fat” tax on foods like ice cream and food purchased at fast food restaurants based on the fact that 60 percent of Americans are overweight or obese according to the BMI charts. Are that many people overweight?

When the BMI charts were revised in 1998, 39 million Americans instantly jumped from the “normal” category into the “overweight” or “obese” category. It makes me wonder if all of the talk about how Americans are so much fatter these days is totally true. I realize Americans are fat compared to people in other countries, but I doubt there are as many fat Americans as our government is saying.

Did you know these celebrities are fat?

Overweight according to BMI

Brad Pitt
Keanu Reeves
Matt Damon
Tom Cruise
Tom Brady
Michael Jordan
Yao Ming

Obese according to BMI

George Clooney
Matt LeBlanc
Mike Tyson

Another F'ing Birthday

2007-04-15T00:02:00.001-07:00

I'm 36, so I'm not so thrilled about having birthdays anymore, but they seem to keep coming.

Other people born on April 15th:

1452 Leonardo da Vinci Italy, painter/sculptor/scientist/visionary
1933 Elizabeth Montgomery Los Angeles CA, actress (Samantha/Serena-Bewitched)
1933 Roy Clark Meherrin VA, country singer (Hee Haw)
1944 Dave Edmunds Cardiff Wales, singer/guitarist (Rockpile-Baby I Love You)
1947 Michael DeBello singer (Maniac)
1959 Emma Thompson Paddington London England, actress (Henry V, Howards End, Oscar-1992)
1965 Anthony Miller NFL wide receiver (Denver Broncos, Dallas Cowboys)
1966 Samantha Fox East End London England, singer (Touch Me, I Wanna Have Some Fun)

Notable events that occurred on April 15th:

1865 President Abraham Lincoln dies, at 7:22 am, morning after being shot by John Wilkes Booth
1990 Greta Garbo actress (Anna Karenina, Camille), dies at 84
1912 Titanic sinks at 2:27 AM in North Atlantic as the band plays on
1923 1st sound on film public performance shown at Rialto Theater
1954 KARK TV channel 4 in Little Rock AR (NBC) begins broadcasting
1955 Ray Kroc starts the McDonald's chain of fast food restaurants
1983 Tokyo Disneyland opens
1986 US air raids Libya, responding to La Belle disco, Berlin bombing
1991 Magic Johnson sets NBA record for career assists with 9,898

RIP: Don Ho

2007-04-14T23:19:00.000-07:00

August 13, 1930 - April 14, 2007

It was reported on the local radio station that Don's funeral will be the first ever to have six Hos as pallbearers.

Food Network Quote of the Year (So Far)

2007-04-09T20:23:00.000-07:00

In a recent episode of Iron Chef America in which the secret ingredient was goat, one of the chefs was seen whacking the back of a pomegranate to remove the seeds, and then rubbing the goat loin with a mixed seasoning in preparation for cooking.

From host Alton Brown: "We've just seen the chef rubbing his loins and spanking his pomegranates on national television. At least someone is happy tonight."

RIP : Mark St. John

2007-04-09T19:16:00.000-07:00

FEBRUARY 7, 1956 - APRIL 5, 2007

Mark was KISS' third guitar player and played on the 1984 Animalize album, the biggest selling non-makeup album the band ever made. He died of a cerebral hemorrhage that was likely caused from an addiction to meth.

Usenet's Moron Quote of the Week

2007-04-04T14:22:00.000-07:00

"Being contrived has absolutely nothing to do with being fake."

- Broncofan (should be Donkeyfan) of Google Group rec.music.artists.kiss

HAPPY EASTER

Keith Richards Will Snort Anything -- Even His Father

2007-04-04T07:48:00.000-07:00

In comments published yesterday, Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones admitted to once snorting the ashes of his cremated father mixed with cocaine.

"The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father," Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME.

I don't find this the least bit surprising. I don't understand how the Rolling Stones have been around for so long and still sell seats for $300 each anytime they tour. They've been washed up for years, and they're one of the most overrated bands of all time in my opinion.

UPDATE: So, the Rolling Stones' manager or publicist is trying to say Keith was joking and basically said it should be considered an April Fool's joke. Uh huh. This is nothing more than an attempt to fix a publicity nightmare.

In an article published on its website, the magazine said the remark was "no quip, but came about after much thinking" by the rock star. "He didn't offer the information, I had to ask him a couple of questions to get the information out of him," interviewer Mark Beaumont was quoted as saying. "He didn't come straight out with that. He did seem to be quite honest about it. There were too many details for him to be making it up."

Now that I think of it, Ol' Keef probably didn't snort his dad's ashes. He probably shot up with them.

On This Date

2007-04-03T14:14:00.000-07:00

On April 3, 1882, 125 years ago, Jesse James took a bullet to the back of the head from the gun of one of his own gang members that shot him for the reward money. Nearly 90 years later, Jesse became "Bobby's Hero" on a very disturbing episode of The Brady Bunch. In the episode, Bobby is obsessed with Jesse James but later changes his mind when he has a dream in which his new hero shoots the rest of the Bradys in the back during a train robbery. Looking back, maybe the episode wasn't that disturbing after all.

World's Tallest Man Gets Hitched

2007-04-03T08:46:00.000-07:00

Bao Xishun, a 7 ft. 9 in. tall herdsman from Mongolia, was officially listed as the tallest man in the world last year by The Guiness Book. Last week Bao married a 28 year old woman (about half his age) that stands 5 ft. 6 in. The woman in the picture is approximately the same height as Bao's new wife. It's hard to believe that at 7 ft. 9 in. tall, Bao Xishun is more than a foot shorter than the tallest person that ever lived, Robert Padlow, who stood 8 ft. 11 3/4 in.

Brother Can't Drive

2007-03-28T17:27:00.001-07:00

At a charity event being sponsored by the upcoming movie, Red Line, some genius decided it was a good idea to let comedian Eddie Griffin behind the wheel of a $1.5 million Enzo Ferrari, and this is the result. The person that handed over the keys must have never watched one of Eddie's stand up routines or movies.

The car had 401 miles on it and can now be purchased for a mere $409,660.

Cowboys To Hold Public Memorial For Crazy Ray

2007-03-20T21:13:00.000-07:00

FROM www.dallascowboys.com

IRVING, Texas - The Dallas Cowboys will pay tribute to the late Wilford "Crazy Ray" Jones, their unofficial mascot of more than 40 years, with a public memorial service at 10 a.m. (CDT) Saturday, March 24 in the Stadium Club at Texas Stadium.

Friends and fans of Crazy Ray and the Cowboys are welcome to attend Saturday's service, which is open to the general public. The Texas Stadium parking lot will open at 9 a.m., and fans will be asked to enter the parking lot located at the Gate 1 parking entrance.

Admission to the Stadium Club will be accessible at Gate 10, next to the statue of Coach Tom Landry.

Ray, 76, died Saturday morning after battling various illnesses over the years. He was a beloved icon since the Cowboys' early days, cheering the franchise on in full western wear.

The Cowboys also announced Tuesday that Ray will be honored at a 2007 regular-season home game at Texas Stadium next fall. A tribute to the team's most famous fan will be presented, and the organization will honor Ray's wife Mattie in an on-field ceremony.

The Cowboys' schedule is expected to be released within the next few weeks.

Over the years, Crazy Ray entertained Cowboys fans at Texas Stadium in his western-style get-up, complete with six-shooters in his holster, a cowboy hat and at times, galloping along with one of those stick ponies. He became as recognizable as the blue star on the Cowboys helmet, the hole in the roof and the Hail Mary.

"Our thoughts and prayers are with Mattie and the Jones family," said Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, making reference to Crazy Ray's wife Mattie of 53 years. "This is a sad day for anyone who is a follower of the Dallas Cowboys. Ray was the most dedicated, entertaining and passionate of Cowboys fans.

"He touched thousands of lives and generations of football fans. He will remain an important part of this team's heritage and family for as long as fans go to Cowboys games and feel his spirit."

Jerry Jones is not given to hyperbole when talking of Crazy Ray's national fame. He has a spot in the fans' wing of the Pro Football Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio, and in the hearts of Cowboys fans worldwide, all recognizing his patented whistle and the magic tricks he would perform while interacting with fans on the sideline of games. It was nothing to see Crazy Ray sparring with the Redskins' mascot in the end zone when those two NFC East rivals would play, no matter if the game was played at Texas Stadium or RFK Stadium in the nation's capital.

Ray, known to some as "Whistling Ray" for the high-pitched shrill his whistle produced, also delighted fans with the quick balloon figurines he twisted together while prowling the Texas Stadium sidelines.

The family will hold a private funeral ceremony on Thursday, and a public memorial will be held Saturday for fans to pay their final respects.

In recent months, fans showed how much they appreciated Crazy Ray over the years, helping the Joneses in various forms and fashions with charitable gestures. When the family car was stolen and found trashed, a local dealership anonymously donated the couple a car.

Then there was the house they had lived in for nearly 30 years. It was in need of total renovation. But Ray and Mattie had little money, Ray having spent a spell of time in a nursing home after his last stroke. They could not pay their bills. Utilities had been turned off.

But thanks to friend and neighbor Wayne Walker, director of video productions at Dallas Theological Seminary, who set up a charitable Web site to help the Joneses, along with a disabled veterans association program (Ray served in the Korean War) which aided with the renovation of the home, Crazy Ray and Mattie were able to move back into their home on Nov. 14 of this past year.

Many of the appliances were donated by local businesses.

Walker was quoted in a recent Dallas Observer story written by Richie Whitt, "He's such a kind, wonderful man. How can you not want to help him. I think we'd all agree he's earned it."

Donations still can be made to help the family offset funeral costs by going to www.SaveCrazyRay.com, where 100 percent of the donations are transferred directly into an account set up for the Joneses.

Along with wife Mattie, Ray is survived by two brothers, Paul Jones, 62, and Jerry Jones, 64, of the Dallas area; a sister, Eugenia Gibson, 78, of Atlanta; and two grandsons, Derrick Jackson, 38, and Darryl Jackson, 35. The daughter of Ray and Mattie Jones, Glenda, preceded him in death seven years ago.

Bon Jovi Goes Country

2007-03-20T10:12:00.000-07:00

It appears that Bon Jovi has completely made the switch over to being a country music band. The band had a hit from a single on their last album called "Who Says You Can't Go Home?" which was definitely a country tune. Now, the band's new album, Lost Highway, which comes out in June was produced by Dann Huff. Dann also produces the country band Rascal Flats and country singer Keith Urban. Bon Jovi is performing the first single from the new album on the CMT Country Music Awards show in Nashville, and another song from the album, "We Got it Going On," is a duet with the country band Big-N-Rich.

I think it's funny that Bon Jovi was considered a "metal" band back in the 80's, but their songs always had a pop sound to them. Each of their albums got progressively softer with more ballads. Jon blew out his vocal chords a few years ago, so he can't even sing the high-pitched, rock 'n' roll style songs from the band's early days anymore, so I guess the band switching to country isn't such a huge stretch. Bon Jovi was never my favorite band, but they managed to escape the hair band stereotype and keep their careers going steadily for about 25 years. That's more than Axl Rose has ever done.

March 19: 25th Anniversay of Randy Rhodes Death

2007-03-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

December 6, 1956 - March 19, 1982

RIP: Crazy Ray

2007-03-18T13:01:00.000-07:00

Crazy Ray, the Dallas Cowboy's unofficial mascot since 1963 when the team played at the Cotton Bowl who endeared himself to millions of fans with his support of the Cowboys, died at his home Saturday morning.

Why couldn't it have been Rowdy?

My First Major Consumer Product

2007-03-16T13:46:00.000-07:00

I have designed metalworking tools and other various products for years. If you drive an American automobile there is a good chance that a tool I designed was used to help make your vehicle. It's satisfying work, but I always wished I could design a product that regular people used. I've done minor work on a few kitchen products but never really anything that I considered MY design. Well, a new product is going into stores now that is MY design.

Pictured is a new V-slicer that I did a majority of the design work on. The idea was to design a slicer that worked like a mandolin but without the hassle and expense, and this is what I came up with. I can't wait to stop in a Bed Bath & Beyond or Sur La Table and see it hanging on a rack. I'll probably even be a real dork and record QVC the first time it's sold on there.

Another Take Home Chef Adult Movie

2007-03-15T19:12:00.000-07:00

How to pick up a chick in a grocery store 101. Curtis Stone is the man.

The (Oval) Office

2007-03-15T11:52:00.000-07:00

George Bush and Tony Blair star in The (Oval) Office. A take-off on NBC's popular show, The Office.

RIP Sinbad: Whenever you actually die.

2007-03-15T11:20:00.000-07:00

I've had three people email me today and ask if I heard the news that the comedian, Sinbad, died of a heart attack yesterday. I went over to Find-A-Grave, but there was no info. I did a Google News search, but found nothing. I also came up empty handed looking through entertainment sites like E!Online. The whole thing was an internet hoax. I was curious how an internet rumor could be spread so quickly, so I did a little research. Apparently, some Bozo posted on Wikipedia that Sinbad had died, and that was all it took.

A word of advice: Wikipedia will let any moron post information on their website as "fact," so never use it as a source of information. Sure, it has some factual stuff on there, but you never know what you are going to get. Wikipedia did remove the incorrect information about Sinbad being dead and have locked his profile from being edited by new users.

Brad Delp Update: Apparent Suicide

2007-03-14T17:59:00.000-07:00

According to police, Brad Delp, lead singer of Boston, committed suicide. Toxicology tests by the state medical examiner's office showed that Delp committed suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning. Police said Delp had sealed himself inside a bathroom with two charcoal grills sometime between 11:30 p.m. Thursday and Friday afternoon (March 8th or 9th), when he was found by fiancee Pamela Sullivan.

Does it have to be ruled suicide just because a guy is trying to cook a few brats in his bathroom? What guy hasn't done that? Sadly, he probably just forgot to turn on the vent.

Culinary Herb is World Wide Live

2007-03-14T15:48:00.000-07:00

The stat tracking website I use has a feature that shows a map of where traffic to my blog is coming from. I had never paid attention to the particular function before, but I decided to look at it this afternoon. I was a little surprised to see that I had visits from across the globe. I think it's pretty cool that some dork like me can write stuff that people in India read, or at least click on by accident. Of course, it's amazing how many web hits you can generate by just posting "Claire Danes in boxers" or "Daniella Sarahyba nude." That last sentence alone will probably generate traffic for the next two days.

It's Getting Hot in Here: Scranton Style

2007-03-14T07:04:00.000-07:00

I didn't mix this video, but the kid that did really did a good job. A little tribute to one of my favorite shows, The Office.

Suicide Squirrels

2007-03-14T06:52:00.000-07:00

By Alan Gomez, USA TODAY

Every year, Neil Engelman carefully collects his data, stands before his company's board of directors and is asked the same question: What caused more outages? The lightning or the squirrels?

Four of the past five years, the answer has been the squirrels, says Engelman, vice president of operations for the Lincoln Electric System in Nebraska. Nebraska is not alone. Many states are grappling with a big increase in the number of power outages caused by squirrel electrocutions.

Squirrels that fry themselves on power lines and transformers cause tens of thousands of blackouts every year.

"It's serious when it causes power outages to 50-60,000 people," said Cathy Engel, a spokeswoman for PECO, which provides electricity to the Philadelphia area.

Among recent outages:

• A squirrel caused a power outage in October that shut down Merced College, southeast of San Francisco, for half the day.

• In January, a squirrel cut power to 4,500 customers in Amarillo, Tex.

• Hundreds of gallons of raw sewage poured into Mobile Bay in Alabama after a squirrel cut power to a sewage lift station there.

Stopping the squirrels is not easy.

"Those guys are awfully clever," said Tim Fox with Ameren, which provides electricity to St. Louis-area homes and businesses.

"When they want to get into something, they do," Fox said.

Squirrel guards have been placed on many transformers, but squirrels adapt to the technology, forcing the utilities to switch to different forms of what's known in the business as "wildlife abatement technology."

"Whenever we think we've got them figured out, they try something else," Engelman said.

Claire Danes & Patrick Wilson GAP Commercial

2007-03-11T12:17:00.000-07:00

Claire Danes doesn't look half bad dancing around in a pair of boxer shorts. The thing that amazes me though, most of the responses I'm getting on youtube.com are from women that like the commercial because of Patrick Wilson. Go figure.

This GAP ad features Claire and Patrick dancing to the tune of "Anything you can do, I can do better" from the Broadway musical, Annie Get Your Gun. Ethel Merman's voice is hard to miss. The ad was directed by LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE directors JONATHAN DAYTON and VALERIE FARIS.

RIP: Brad Delp Lead Singer of Boston

2007-03-09T19:18:00.000-08:00

I think Boston's self-titled debut album ranks in the top ten of all time. It was the first CD that I ever bought for an album that I already owned on cassette back in the day. Brad had a great voice that is probably recognized by more people than knew his name. The band's official website was taken down today and replaced with a single sentence, "We've just lost the nicest guy in rock and roll." Brad was 55.

Brad's Memorial on Find-A-Grave

The Official Boston Website

Borat

2007-03-09T07:16:00.000-08:00

I liked Borat better when he was still the lead singer for Queen.

RIP: Captain America 1941-2007

2007-03-08T13:31:00.000-08:00

Like Superman and countless other comic book heroes, I have the feeling he'll be back before too long.

2007 Beale Street Music Festival Lineup

2007-03-08T12:49:00.000-08:00

Here is the complete lineup for the 2007 Beale Street Music Festival.

Click Here for the Offical Website.

Friday, May 4

The Allman Brothers Band
Three 6 Mafia
Koko Taylor
Gym Class Heroes
Gov’t Mule
Social Distortion
Richard Johnston
The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Jerry Lee Lewis
Chevelle
Hubert Sumlin & Willie "Big Eyes" Smith
Plain White T’s
The Derek Trucks Band
North Mississippi Allstars
Popa Chubby

Saturday, May 5

Steely Dan
Godsmack
George Thorogood
Bobby "Blue" Bland
The Bar-Kays
Wolfmother
The Ohio Players
Walter Trout & The Radicals
Kenny Wayne Shepherd
Taking Back Sunday
Taj Mahal
Ryan Shaw
Kelley Hunt
Old Crow Medicine Show
Jack’s Mannequin
The John Butler Trio
Alvin Youngblood Hart
Eddie Floyd
Hawthorne Heights
Keller Williams
David "Honeyboy" Edwards
One Less Reason
The Duhks
Daddy Mack Blues Band

Sunday, May 6

Counting Crows
John Legend
Hinder
Elvin Bishop
Barenaked Ladies
Corrine Bailey Rae
DAUGHTRY
Tab Benoit
Guster
Edwin McCain
Project Pat
Backdoor Slam
Umphrey’s McGee
Ann Peebles
Papa Roach
Watermelon Slim
Billy Lee Riley
Egypt Central
The Lee Boys
James "Super Chikan" Johnson

Big Butter Jesus: Heywood Banks

2007-03-06T13:51:00.001-08:00

If you're ever on I-75 between Dayton and Cincinnati, you can see this monstrousity from the interstate. What makes the whole thing even funnier is that there is a gigantic adult books and novelty store called Hustler-Hollywood on the other side of the interstate.

Hey, You're Crazy Bitch

2007-03-04T13:57:00.000-08:00

Britney Spears is now one of the family, and Uncle Charlie is so proud.

Okay, I added the X. Supposedly, the dumb bitch actually did scrawl a "666" on her forehead before attempting suicide with a bed sheet, but I couldn't help but think of Patty Krenwinkel and Leslie Van Houten when I saw this pic.

If she doesn't die first, I'm hoping there will be a tear-jerking comeback on Oprah. I imagine that Oprah will bring in Tom Cruise to offer his advice to Britney on the wonders of Scientology right before Britney loses it again and guts Tom like a fish.

Chuck E. Cheese

2007-03-03T11:26:00.000-08:00

I didn't know that I hated Chuck E. Cheese until I took my daughter there about a month ago. What a nightmare. Kids were running around like crazy, the food was overpriced and terrible, and my daughter was plunking tokens left and right into games that lasted about thirty seconds each. My parents used to complain about me wasting money at the video arcade when I was younger, but I could at least play Galaga or Ms. Pac-Man for at least a couple of hours with one quarter. Anyway, my daughter had a good time, and that was the most important thing. I just told her that next time we go there, we're going to eat lunch somewhere else first.

Charlie Hodge

2007-03-02T18:26:00.000-08:00

Charlie was a close friend of Elvis. He was the guy that handed Elvis the scarves that got tossed to women in the crowd and the guy that was actually playing guitar while Elvis strummed away on an instrument that didn't have any amplification. Charlie passed away one year ago on March 3rd. Now who's going to hand The King his scarves at the Elvis 30th Anniversary Concert later this year in Memphis?

MOVIE REVIEW: Babel

2007-03-02T08:08:00.000-08:00

This movie makes a Shakespearean tragedy look like Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. The basic plot depicts the misfortunes of four disparate groups of people: an American husband and wife struggling to survive in Morocco after the woman has been hit by a stray bullet, a nanny that illegally enters Mexico with two small children in order to see her son’s wedding, a rebellious Japanese girl trying to find her identity as police search for her father, and two young boys in a small African village that must suffer the consequences of a tragic accident. Although they are separated by oceans and continents, the stories of these people are all intertwined.

Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett, the only recognizable actors in the film, play the American couple. Brad Pitt is in his mid-40’s now, and he looks every bit of fifty in this film. I’m not sure if his natural age is showing, the makeup was authentic looking, or a combination of the two, but I believe his appearance made his role more believable. I don’t necessarily dislike Brad Pitt, but you have to question a guy that is willing to stick his manhood in a space that was once occupied by Billy Bob Thornton. Cate Blanchett is believable in any role.

The shooting of the American woman is the link between the stories and actually the cause for the other tragedies. I’m not sure what the filmmaker’s intentions were, but I found myself being angry and believing that with the exception of the American couple and the small children being transported into Mexico, all of the suffering by the characters in this movie was caused by their own stupidity, and they deserved every horrible thing that happened to them. I doubt that some liberal Hollywood producer was trying to evoke those emotions from the audience, but if that was his intent, then the guy is a genius.

Although I think this was a very well written and intriguing movie, there is not a single light-hearted or upbeat frame in the entire 2 hour and 30 minute runtime. Still, I never found myself bored or wanting to turn it off. The events and characters are interesting enough to make watching the film worthwhile.

Jim Carrey Impersonates David Caruso on Letterman

2007-02-27T10:02:00.000-08:00

I'm not a big Jim Carrey fan, but his impersonation of David Caruso is spot on. The first video is of David Caruso one liners from CSI Miami, and the second video is of Jim Carrey's impersonation of Caruso on Letterman.

Britney Spears and Her Twin Brother

2007-02-21T17:30:00.000-08:00

Happy Mardi Gras!

2007-02-20T06:26:00.001-08:00

Fat Tuesday is here once again, and I'm stuck in an office programming a CNC vertical mill. Here's a pic from Mardi Gras 2001, the last time I got to join the festivities. I'm the one in the Paul Stanley makeup. I had a reason for touching up my lipstick, but I'm not really sure what my friend's boyfriend was doing.

SI's Daniella Sarahyba Almost Nude KISS Tribute

2007-02-19T07:34:00.000-08:00

Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, Daniella Sarahyba, recently did a photo shoot wearing nothing but a painted body suit of the four faces from the KISS solo albums. I first thought this was some sort of publicity stunt by Gene the Twinkie Machine, but it turns out that Daniella is really a fan of the band despite being only two months old when KISS released their twentieth album in 1984. You can see the rest of the photos here:
Daniella Sarahyba or click the pic above.

David Letterman Shaves Ben Roethlisberger

2007-02-13T10:40:00.000-08:00

I've seen some strange things on David Letterman over the years, but this has to rank among one of the most bizarre things I've ever seen on the show. There is no doubt that Ben needed that shit cut off of his face, but he's a bold man for letting David Letterman do the shaving.

Cooking Show or Adult Entertainment?

2007-02-12T20:31:00.000-08:00

There is a show on TLC called Take Home Chef. The show has an Aussie named Curtis Stone that picks out strange women in grocery stores and fixes dinner for them and their husbands/boyfriends. Now, I have seen one or two adult movies when I was younger, and I couldn't help but notice how much the Take Home Chef resembled a popular adult movie download site called The MILF Hunter.

Both shows have the star picking up a mother (single or married) and sweet talking them into having fun in front of the cameras. The major difference between the two shows is what happens once each guy gets the moms out of the grocery store. Curtis, the Take Home Chef, takes the mother home and cooks a meal for her and her family. The MILF Hunter has a different idea about what "cooking" means.

Below are a few clips from the beginning of the The Take Home Chef. Notice that Curtis sneaks up on the unsuspecting mother, gets her to agree to going back to her house, buys a bunch of beer and aphrodisiac type foods and crawls into her vehicle with her. I always heard that grocery stores were a great place to meet women, and Curtis proves that as a fact week after week.

REVIEW: The Departed

2007-02-12T10:46:00.000-08:00

This movie is completely different from anything Martin Scorsese has ever made. I’m not totally certain if that is a good thing or not. The cast includes Jack Nicholson, Martin Sheen, Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, Alec Baldwin, and Leonardo DiCaprio. I’m a pretty big fan of Nicholson and Sheen, but I can usually take or leave the other guys; however, I think all of the acting in this movie is pretty good. Even Leonardo DiCaprio seems to have redeemed himself a little from all of that bullshit he made in the late 90’s.

The basic plot of the movie from IMDB.com:
Years ago, a powerful Irish mafia figure (Nicholson) placed a small selection of his youngest, brightest men into the Massachusetts Police Academy as cadets. Their purpose is to eventually rise within the prestigious ranks of the city's police department, to serve as the eyes and ears of their boss. While somewhere else, a young cadet (DiCaprio) was assigned with an equally dangerous task: infiltrate the Irish syndicate headed by the man sending in his own to the Boston Police. Now, one cadet (Damon) is an up and coming police official with a torn allegiance to his job and to the criminal mastermind that put him there. While the other cadet is the trusted number two of that man, only finding his professional duties are becoming blurred with his current state. But new clues have lead to unfortunate discoveries, when both sides realize they're being watched by the enemy. It's now all just a matter of time before the men assigned to find out whose the infiltrator, could come to a bloody end when someone's identity may be revealed.

The Departed is two hours and thirty minutes long, which is forty-five minutes too long in my opinion. A lot of the plot drags, and I found myself somewhat bored at times. However, the final fifteen minutes of the movie were so twisted and shocking that I was left asking myself, “What the fuck just happened?” I wasn’t confused. It was obvious what happened, but I was not expecting the movie to end the way it did. I wouldn’t say it was as shocking as the end of The Sixth Sense, but close.

After seeing the ending, I wanted to go back and watch parts of the movie again. Unfortunately, I rented the movie from a hotel pay-per-view, so I had no way of doing that. I am leaning towards the opinion that the slow parts of the movie were worth sitting through. This flick would be worth renting in my opinion, and I may rent it again to see if it’s better the second time around, but I wouldn’t fork out $20 to buy it.

The Departed is being released on DVD tomorrow, Tuesday, Feb. 13th.

Anthony Bourdain Comments About Rachael Ray

2007-02-10T15:07:00.000-08:00

I don't expect that Anthony Bourdain is very famous outside of the culinary world, but I have become a big fan of his recently. Anthony has been somewhat of a reluctant celebrity chef and author for over thirty years. Unlike more popular celebrity chefs such as Emeril Lagasse and Bobby Flay, Anthony is a hard living guy that makes no excuses for his heavy drinking, smoking, or brash personality. What I like most about Anthony is that he is a genuine person, and what you see is what you get. There is no bullshit with this guy.

Anthony currently has a show on the Travel Channel called No Reservations. The show is not a cooking program but more like an adult's only version of Rachael Ray's Tasty Travels without the annoying voice, big mouth, and big ass. In No Reservations, Anthony travels the world and samples cuisine from various cultures. Sometimes Anthony can be seen crawling out of bed with a hangover to have a smoke before heading off to the next culinary adventure. If Anthony doesn't like a meal, he is not afraid to criticize it. If he thinks the food is shit, he calls it shit, and he has the culinary training and credentials to make such judgements.

Recently, Anthony posted a blog about several of the celebrities on The Food Network, including Ray Ray. Anthony's comments about Ray Ray expressed the same sentiments I have had about her for the past year. The more I see her, the more I dislike her, but she's not going away any time soon. Here are Anthony's thoughts on Ray Ray:

RACHAEL: Complain all you want. It’s like railing against the pounding surf. She only grows stronger and more powerful. Her ear-shattering tones louder and louder. We KNOW she can’t cook. She shrewdly tells us so. So...what is she selling us? Really? She’s selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough. She’s a friendly, familiar face who appears regularly on our screens to tell us that “Even your dumb, lazy ass can cook this!” Wallowing in your own crapulence on your Cheeto-littered couch you watch her and think, “Hell…I could do that. I ain’t gonna…but I could--if I wanted! Now where’s my damn jug a Diet Pepsi?” Where the saintly Julia Child sought to raise expectations, to enlighten us, make us better--teach us--and in fact, did, Rachael uses her strange and terrible powers to narcotize her public with her hypnotic mantra of Yummo and Evoo and Sammys. “You’re doing just fine. You don’t even have to chop an onion--you can buy it already chopped. Aspire to nothing…Just sit there. Have another Triscuit…Sleep….sleep….”

Pure genious and pretty ballsy considering that he has an upcoming show on the Food Network. I have no doubt that if Anthony and Ray Ray cross paths in the FN hallway, he'll make the same comments to her face.

You can visit Anthony's website by clicking his pic above.

Here's a clip of Anthony in Vietnam eating a cobra heart that is still beating. I doubt Emeril has the nuts for this.

Anna Nicole Smith Dead

2007-02-08T13:39:00.000-08:00

No big shocker, but I always think it's tragic when somebody dies so young. Her having a newborn makes it even worse. I'm curious to know what the autopsy results will reveal. I'm thinking suicide or accidental overdose at the least. I suppose her death will immortalize her to some extent.

Maybe Anna Nicole and Marilyn Monroe are having a conversation somewhere in the great beyond and actually understand each other.

Gene Simmons and Nicholas Cage

2007-02-07T20:34:00.000-08:00

Is Nick Cage preparing to star in a Gene Simmons biography? Not likely. Perhaps Gene has started licensing his hairdo as part of the KISS empire.

The Alpha MILF Exposed

2007-02-02T10:46:00.000-08:00

My God, my God, why has thou forsaken me?

Dying Knievel Makes Final Leap to End Feud with Stuntman Son

2007-02-02T08:10:00.000-08:00

AS father and son, they have long been considered too alike to be friends. But now that Evel Knievel, the legendary stuntman, is preparing for death, he has ended a 30-year feud with his daredevil son Robbie.

The 68-year-old motorcycle ace, who risked his life for years in spectacular leaps over buses, canyons and sharks, is girding himself to “pass over his final jump” at home in Florida, Robbie said last week.

His father has pulmonary fibrosis and a morphine pump stapled to his abdomen to ease the pain from lung disease and the 35 bones he has broken.

“He is dying, we are preparing for it. He is ready to meet God and ask him why he made some of his jumps too short,” said his 44-year-old son.

Knievel, who was once jailed for reckless driving, “is finding peace with people around him and, at last, that includes me”, said Robbie, who has established his own reputation for hard living and daring stunts.

“At least we are talking and that is more than we have done since he kicked me out of home when I was teenager. Before that there were years of arguments — I had been jumping on my bike since I was tiny but he didn’t want me to follow in his footsteps,” said Robbie.

In the 1960s Robert Craig Knievel, nicknamed “Evel” while in prison for theft, paved the way for today’s “extreme” sports. A former skiing champion from Montana, he escaped his life of safe-cracking and selling life insurance policies to asylum inmates when he wore a white leather jumpsuit copied from Liberace, the Las Vegas entertainer, and jumped 90ft across a pit filled with rattlesnakes. He became a massive star.

He set many records but broke more bones. He was in a coma for 28 days after failing to clear the fountains at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. He caught his wheel on the last of 13 buses parked side by side at Wembley Stadium in 1975, crashing but still limping to the microphone to announce a short retirement.

By his own account Knievel has lived to the full, blowing a £20m fortune, bedding 2,000 women including eight in one day, and soaking his chest with whisky and setting it alight for a joke in a Washington bar.

He was friends with Elvis Presley and Lee Marvin, who said Knievel was “the cool tough guy we all love playing on the screen, the genuine article”.

Now Robbie has one last record to break. He wants to make his own farewell jump, in the summer of 2008, across a stack of double-decker buses in Wembley Stadium: “I am not competing with my father, not exactly. But it’s the right way to honour his amazing courage.”

Coffee Anyone?

2007-01-31T11:29:00.000-08:00

There aren't too many places where business is more cutthroat than in Seattle. Seattle, home of the Starbuck's chain, has hundreds of local coffee houses all fighting for the same nickel. However, there is a fairly new coffee shop chain in the Seattle area that is giving its competitors, even Starbucks, a reason to take notice. This new chain has gone back to a very old business model to garner their success. That business model is "Sex sells," and the new chain is called Cowgirls Espresso.

Cowgirls Espresso owner, Lori Bowden, opened her first coffee stand four years ago. Lori's two employees, Candice and Toni, coaxed her into doing "Bikini Wednesdays." Immediately, the profit on Wednesdays doubled. "School Girl Tuesdays", "Cowgirl Thursdays," and "Military Mondays" were later added.

Cowgirls Espresso now has six locations in the Seattle area. Their website can be visited at www.cowgirlsespresso.com, or just click the pictures above.

The Police to Reunite at the Grammy Awards

2007-01-30T11:21:00.000-08:00

The rumors are true: The Police will reunite for a performance that will open the broadcast of the 49th Annual Grammy awards at Staples Center on Feb. 11, the Recording Academy announced early Tuesday.

The British trio of Sting, Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland have set aside their legendary animus for one another to revive one of the most popular rock bands ever and, in the weeks after the awards gala, they are expected to announce a concert tour that will certainly be one of the hottest tickets of the year.

For fans, the announcement is cause for excitement but not shock; the band members have been talking publicly in recent months about a negotiated reunion to celebrate the band's 30th anniversary as a rock 'n' roll enterprise.

The band split in 1984 after seven years and five studio albums jammed with memorable, often reggae-influenced hits, among them "Roxanne," "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic," "Spirits in the Material World," "Wrapped Around Your Finger" and the 1980s signature song of love-as-obsession, "Every Breath You Take," which won the 1983 Grammy for song of the year.

The song title that best described their attitude toward one another by the mid-1980s, however, may have been "Don't Stand So Close to Me," especially as Summers and Copeland chafed under Sting's push for more artistic control. He got his wish with a solo career and his estranged band mates kept busy with numerous and respected projects through years but never came close to matching the singer's commercial success.

The trio did call a ceasefire in their personal feuds long enough to play at their induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in New York City in 2003.

Now singer-bassist Sting, guitarist Summers and drummer Copeland will come to Los Angeles and play the Grammys 30 years to the month after the Police released their debut single, "Fall Out." That anniversary and tie-in releases scheduled this year of music from the band's archives has been cited as the motivation for the thaw between the band members.

The Grammys will air on CBS and scheduled performers this year include Justin Timberlake, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Mary J. Blige, John Legend, John Mayer, Gnarls Barkley and the Dixie Chicks.

Hobbits are People Too

2007-01-30T10:42:00.000-08:00

By Ker Than
LiveScience staff writer

New computerized casts of abnormally small Homo sapiens brains are reigniting the debate over the skeletal remains nicknamed "The Hobbit."

Ever since the 18,000-year-old remains of the three-foot-tall adult female hominid were unearthed in 2003 on the remote Indonesian island of Flores, scientists have argued whether the specimen was a human with an abnormally small head or represents a new species in the human family tree. The diminutive creature had a brain approximately one-third the size of modern adult humans.

Some scientists named the specimen Homo floresiensis, a dwarfed offshoot of Homo erectus, a human ancestor that lived as far back as 1.8 million years ago.

In the latest study, the evidence supports the claim of a new species. A team of scientists led by Dean Falk, a paleoneurologist at Florida State University, compared computer-generated three-dimensional reconstructions, called "endocasts," of brains from nine microcephalic modern humans with those of 10 normal modern-human brains.

"We asked, ‘Is there anything other than size of the brain that separates these two groups?'" Falk said.

According to the researchers, the answer is "yes." They found that two ratios, created using different skull measurements, could be used to accurately distinguish the normal humans from the microcephalics nearly 100 percent of the time.

David Lee Roth to Rejoin Van Halen

2007-01-24T20:27:00.000-08:00

It is being reported that David Lee Roth is going to sign a contract to once again be the frontman for Van Halen. Ironically, Roth predicted this exact thing to happen almost a year ago. Roth was quoted by Billboard.com in May 2006 when asked of a potential reunion with his ex-bandmates, "I see it absolutely as an inevitability. To me it's not rocket surgery."

I'm not sure what "rocket surgery" is, but I guess ol' Diamond Dave knew what he was talking about. The band's recent induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has made his words a reality.

REVIEW: The Black Dahlia

2007-01-24T14:59:00.000-08:00

I watch a lot of movies, so I thought I'd throw in my own movie reviews here and there. Here is my review of The Black Dahlia:

THIS MOVIE SUCKS ASS.

I should have known any movie with Josh Hartnett couldn't be that great, but not even Scarlett Johansson in underwear could save this piece of shit. Drawn out and boring. There is way too much time spent trying to develop characters, and the murder is a secondary part of the script. Don't waste your money on this one. If you want to see a good movie about a true crime, then go rent the original In Cold Blood with Robert "O.J. Simpson" Blake. You could also rent Capote, which basically chronicles the years of Capote's life while he wrote In Cold Blood and includes a lot scenes regarding the murders described in the book.

My Heart. What Keeps Me Going in Life.

2007-01-23T11:49:00.000-08:00

Heidi Klum in an $8M Bra

2007-01-19T17:05:00.000-08:00

You Want a Piece of Me?

2007-01-19T08:59:00.000-08:00

Ding Dong the Dick is Dead

2006-12-29T21:22:00.000-08:00

God will have no mercy on you.

Heidi Klum Christmas Commercial

2006-12-22T06:25:00.000-08:00

UPDATE (12/26/06): This video received the honor for being #53 on YouTube Favorites of the Week in the People-All category, and #36 in the same category for English only videos.

They show this Victoria's Secret commercial twice during each rerun of CSI on Spike TV. Spike typically shows three reruns (or more) every night, and I watch them all, so I've been seeing this commercial about six times every night, and it just isn't enough. So, I decided to post it for myself and watch it whenever I want. It has a very Marilynesque quality.

Call me crazy, but I think Heidi is way hotter now than she was ten years ago, and has definitely achieved MILF status.

Merry Christmas, KISSMAS, Festivus & Happy New Year

2006-12-21T20:13:00.000-08:00

Or whatever holiday you celebrate.

Ron Springs & Everson Walls

2006-12-21T13:05:00.000-08:00

Ron Springs played for the Dallas Cowboys for six seasons. He was a solid player that quietly backed up Tony Dorsett during those six years. Ron still lives in Dallas and is now suffering from diabetes and kidney failure. Ron has been on dialysis trying to get healthy enough to undergo a kidney transplant.

During the search for a kidney donor, it was discovered that Ron's son Shawn, a cornerback for the Washington Redskins, was a match. However, Ron refused to accept his son's kidney. The transplant procedure would have ended Shawn Springs' professional football career. Things weren't looking too good for Ron until an old team mate and friend, Everson Walls, was also found to be a match. Walls has agreed to donate a kidney to his old Cowboy mate.

"Everson Walls is my dad's best friend and somebody who taught me a lot about being a cornerback in the NFL," Shawn Springs said.

Everson Walls ended his career with the New York Giants, and I remember being really upset that he left the Cowboys, because he was one of my favorite players, and he didn't leave under the best of circumstances. Walls went on to get a Super Bowl ring with the Giants under coach Bill Parcells, something Walls would have never achieved with the Cowboys as they were going through some lean years at the time.

Everson is doing a really good thing donating his kidney to a man that probably wouldn't live long without it, so I guess it's time for me to forgive Everson for joining the enemy twenty years ago.